Last Thursday was the 'big event.' After a series of blood
tests, an oncologist visit, I was on my way to the Methodist Hospital, nervous
and anticipating the full-body cancer scan.
I'm not a big fan of needles and the nervousness grew
waiting for the assistant to appear in the small room. Wearing a hospital gown, sweating and thinking.
Pacing, humming and examining the sterile room did zero to calm my anxiety.
Needles and tomb-like contraptions that constantly clang (making a gal wonder
if a weird entity is doing its best to join in the fun) happens to not be on my
favorite activity list.
I admit it. I overreacted on the before thought of the scan
but I did mention that I'm not a big fan of being stuck and entombed.
Overall, it wasn't so bad. She injected a glucose solution
into my veins and said "no reading
or thinking." What? I was supposed to remain calm with no worries? 'Yep', she had the nerve to say. The
brain has the potential to use the glucose. If the brain consumes its fill before
the tumors get a bite, it's another dose. Tumors are 'hungry lil buggers' and
relaxing - not thinking - would give 'first nibbles' to the life invaders.
Say no more. I'm calm. With the help of the glucose, my mind
went to another zone – sugar euphoria. The glucose injection made me feel as if
I'd eaten a large holiday, carb-filled meal. Blissfully, in a sugar sleep state,
remembering only 1% of the ordeal, it was divine.
Afterwards, the 3-hour wait for the oncologist's results
went fast. My hubby is the 'bestest.' He kept me entertained. I know bestest is
not a word but it's my word to describe him. Throughout my cancer ordeal, my
hubby has been a constant companion. Keeping the schedules organized for my
treatment, he'd wake me up every morning to the smell of coffee and breakfast.
Reminding me to 'pop' my anxiety pill and connect my IPOD, he'd whisk me to the
car, urge me to sleep during the ride to the appointment, deposit me at the radiation
sign-up desk to begin treatment and then he'd wait. After treatment with a
drink and snack for me in his hand, we'd begin the journey home, I'd sleep, and
he'd begin his workday. Not once did I hear him complain.
I've always known. He's my fiercest defender. Without a
glance or verbal acknowledgement to offenders, he'll stand by my side. I've
often asked him why he doesn't see a friend anymore and he'll say, "Why? If someone has the audacity to be
rude to you…that person isn't a very good friend to me." That's my
hubby. He's my protector helping me
survive life. With his help, I survived
cancer. My hubby is my best friend. He is the 'bestest.'
In the oncologist's office, once again anxiety reared its
ugly head. My hubby picks up an outdated magazine and begins to read out loud
events that happened years ago. Giving him my desperate look, he grins, "What?" Without saying a word,
he knows. The magazine dear…how old is the darn magazine? He promptly shows me
the cover and informs me that it's not outdated but a 'classic.' He continues
to read. We are laughing when the doctor comes into the room. She's impressed. Another
example on what I mean about my hubby being the bestest. Left on my own, sitting
here waiting, I'd probably burst into tears, thinking the worst and now I am laughing
about a magazine, before my oncologist gives me news about the results.
When she smiles - I know. When she begins the congrats - it
sinks in. I'm cancer-free.
I did the happy dance down the halls of the Methodist
Hospital. Those who really know me know I care less what others think, and by
the way, that counts double when I'm in a happy mood dance mode. If you're a
stranger and I'll never see you again, that counts triple, so the happy dance
continued down to the parking garage. My
motto: Life is too short; don't let others steal your joy!
Dancing down to the car, my hubby smiled. He cares less what
others think too. Loves the child in me. Loves me for being me. He loves to see
the cancer-free happy dance. I'm a lucky gal!
The oncologist stated
the symptoms I am having as normal for radiation in the orbital area:
1)
Occasionally upon waking, noticing the left-side/under
the eye/ bruise discoloration and swelling.
2)
Upon waking, left-eye tears. Tearing helps to
protect the retina.
3)
Energy level not fully recovered. Recommends
rest. Finding a positive outlet for exercise to increase the energy level.
4)
Headaches relieve with Advil.
5)
Hair and lashes continue to slightly thin. No
worries. Both will come back.
Waterfall
A life is an endless stream.Yeah there are rapids
but most people don't get to the waterfall
well we did!
We will fight together
to get through this endless nightmare.
Together we will fight this
and make it back safe from this waterfall.
